Team Building Facilitation Style That Works

How to Become One with Your Group

For example, I worked with one organization for almost a decade. The first gathering was on-site at their location – the home field, so to speak. It was rare for this organization to bring in an outsider as so much of their training was done with internal staff. When I arrived they were sitting at desks, in rows and very formal. This was day one of a five day team development and challenge course skills training. According to the team leader, who greeted me privately, I would have about two hours to “win them over” and if I didn’t, he assured me I would only be “tolerated” for the next five days. Needless to say, I was nervous and felt the pressure of the moment. However, I was well prepared. I wore a blue button down shirt, khaki pants and shoes. I distributed three ring binders and told them they needed to read them prior to the next morning. I described what we would be doing for the next five days and what my expectations were for success. I was friendly but professional and somewhat curt. It was all an act and so contrary to any beginning I’d ever done before. We stayed in that room for the morning reviewing materials and answering questions. I played into their style and could slowly feel them warming up and dropping their guard. On the way to lunch, the team leader said two words to me… “You’re In.” This was the beginning of a 10 year long relationship that grew as strong as any I’ve ever had with a client. They welcomed me into their fold and allowed me to lead them to places they never thought they could go as individuals and as a group. I’m convinced that my efforts to assimilate on that first day gave me the window of opportunity to then be genuine, be myself and give them the best experience possible.

Disconnect Happens – Learn from the Experience

In contrast, a colleague once described to me how he had “lost his group” in the first hour of a day long training. I asked him to describe his opening and he outlined how he announced “his terms and expectations” for the day including some things that he strongly believed in. He said he could immediately tell that the group was not going to engage making for a very long day. Ouch! Of course, ground rules and boundaries need to be set, but connecting first with the group’s needs, and its idiosyncrasies and foibles, is paramount for the work of an effective facilitator. In fact, this is what makes the work always original and a constant source of mutual learning.

At this point in my career, I have worked with a broad diversity of groups including students, teachers, administrators, military, business executives, law enforcement, professional athletes, and on and on. I think my continued passion for my work and satisfaction in long-term relationships with customers, has come from being myself, being genuine and being there for others, but I have never hesitated to be “chameleon-like” to make it happen. Remember… “It’s never about you.”